THE HARDEST DAY
SPOILERS – series finale.
Word Count: 300
24th January – after Dean's death. It was the hardest day.
The first 24th January after it happened was hard.
Sam tried not to look down into the liquid wells of heartbreak that were aimed directly at him.
"I know Miracle," he sighed. "I miss him too."
Sam just couldn't deal with someone else's sorrow. He could hardly deal with his own. The fog of his intoxication was barely managing to soften the bitterness of his grief.
There were too many memories, his mind was awash with them.
Every year, Dean always bought himself a massive pie for his birthday and would sit and trough it down within minutes, much to Sam's amusement.
Sam had bought a big apple pie yesterday, intending to eat it as a tribute to Dean. But this morning, his appetite had fled. His mind and body were as empty as his soul.
It was everything Sam could do to fight the urge to head for the nearest crossroads and do what he was desperate to do. It was taking a superhuman effort to stop himself. But he wouldn't. He'd made a promise to Dean; it was practically Dean's dying wish. That promise was sacred, no matter how much it hurt.
Sam would throw the pie out for the birds tomorrow. At least someone would gain some pleasure from Dean's birthday.
Sam hoped that one day, Dean's birthday could become a happy day. A day when his memories would bring comfort, not anguish. A day, not for missing what he lost, but celebrating what he had.
Sam knew that day was a long way off, and there was a lot of grieving for him to do; but one day he would smile on Dean's birthday again.
One day he would face the world again.
One day he would eat pie.