It may or may not be common knowledge, but Jensen came 7th in the 100 most handsome faces of 2019 poll. Now, whilst I struggle to compute the possibilllity that six men were allegedly more handsome than Jensen, I will remain
Therefore with a view to investigating this matter, and drawing my own informed and utterly impartial – what, stop laughing over there – conclusions, I am presenting the following evidence and observations in the form of a Jensen’s face picspam.
See, Jensen is rightfully astounded that they think there are six people more handsome than him.
Looks pretty handsome to me, all scrubbed up and dressed pretty.
In the interests of impartiality, let’s examine a picture of Jensen less … primped.
All sweaty and dishevelled. Now, we need to ask ourselves, does sweatiness and dishevelment diminish the handsomeness?
I’ll ponder on this while I’m licking the screen…
Can’t write. Still licking the screen.
Damnit thith static playth havoc with your tongue …
Now, we ask. Does facial hair diminish the handsomeness? Nope.
What about a jacket made from his daughter’s bedroom curtains? Um … nope.
Now, we examine Jensen in profile…
Talk among yourselves, I'll come back to you in an hour to two …
Don’t mind me, just doing a bit more examining…
People often say that good lighting is important in taking a good picture.
Of course that’s true, but it helps is you look like a freaking Adonis too!
On the subject of lighting, tastefully subtle, artsy fartsy lighting can help someone look their best too.
Of course, Jensen could stand under a spinning discoball and still incinerate every ovary in the room.
Now hats don’t suit some people. This could be a deciding factor in gauging Jensen’s handsomeness.
Who am I kidding, a bin bag and a bunch of bananas would suit this man.
Black and white can be rather unforgiving and shows up a multitude of flaws.
*three hours later* Um, still looking for those flaws …
Now, eye colour can be a big contributor to handsomeness, and green eyes are one of the rarer eye colours.
Only 2% of the human population have green eyes. And none of them look as good as these buggers.
Of course, black demon eyes are even rarer, especially when there’s only one. But it still looks hellishly good here!
They say clothes maketh the man. These clothes maketh me spontaneously combust.
Some people think facial crinkles are aging and diminish handsomeness.
Those people who say this have clearly never seen these facial crinkles.
Handsomeness is in the personality as well as the face. A gentle, loving soul is as handsome as a beautiful face.
It must be true, Jensen says so.
See how beautiful Jensen’s soul is?
A masculine handsome man doesn’t care if he’s bathed in pink light.
We don’t care either. He could be bathed in asses milk for all we care. Just so long as we get to help.
The subject of handsomeness is extremely challenging. Jensen is an highly qualified expert. Smug git!
In fact, you could say he's the King of Handsome.
Here at the dizzojay journal, we work hard to bring you the very highest quality handsomeness.
There’s high quality, and then there’s downright bloody stellar.
You know you’re seriously handsome when your face appears on the front cover of a magazine.
Unless, of course, it’s ‘Tarpaulins Monthly’ or something like that.
Opinion is divided as to whether facial hair enhances the handsomeness or not.
The compromise is always a
lickable reasonable option.
Hair is an important factor to think of when assessing handsomeness. It’s nice when it’s neat and well-groomed like this.
However, the freshly-showered look works too.
Remember what I said about licking the screen? I’m one good picture away from eating it right now …
Jensen always looks less handsome in a Leather jacket.
Said no human being. Ever.
Jensen, stop it.
Handsomeness is also enhanced by a man being able to laugh at himself.
Of course, it helps if we can laugh at him too…
I think Jensen rather likes being unbelievably, ridiculously handsome.
We don’t mind it too much either.
In summing up, I present the below as my final evidence as to the undeniable handsomeness on display here.
Who am I to argue with one of the greatest minds of all time.
After careful consideration, and hours of carefully examined and peer-reviewed evidence, I present the following findings.
- Jensen Ackles is the most handsome man in existence
- The survey is talking shite.
Full survey results here
Credit as per watermarks. Happy to add credit as required.